(Las vegas wedding) Ge Your Older Child Used to the New Baby
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Get Your Older Child Used to the New Baby
By: Lucy Cope
(Childrens book author and proud mother of two)
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So, youve brought a brand new baby home, youre exhausted, youre spouse is exhausted, and your older child is having a little trouble coping with the new addition to the family. Its always been just the three of you and now its the four of you. Your new baby is receiving more attention because she has more needs, but your older child just doesnt seem to understand that. Many families face the dilemma of having an older child that feels left out or less important when a new baby comes into the picture. Im sure you think that your older child will never feel the same, and some of you may feel as if youve somehow hurt your older child by having another child. Its natural for the older child to have some jealousy toward a new baby, but you can easily ease your child into accepting the new member of the family and bring your children together as close and bonded siblings.
Introduce Sharing
It is important to introduce the idea of sharing early on because this will be challenge for a good portion of your childrens childhood. The best way my husband and I have introduced sharing with my older son, is with food. If we are eating something, we share it with him and then we say something like, We love to share with you. When he is eating something, we ask for a bite and then positively reinforce the behavior by saying, Thank you. You are so good at sharing. When he plays with a toy, we play with him and ask him which one is ours to play with. We always tell him how wonderful he is, so he is always more than happy to share with us. When you introduce the idea of sharing with you, he will be used to the idea of sharing with others.
When the new baby is born, it is important that you get the older child a big brother or a big sister present. Something we did with my son was to give him a couple of the stuffed animals given to the baby. We told him that the baby likes to share with him because he is so special. He can also see sharing in a positive light in this way. Some of our friends and family also got him a big brother present, so he wouldnt feel left out. The baby doesnt know the difference yet, and my older son felt like the new baby was just as special and important.
Hes My Baby
A great way to get your older child used to having a new baby around is to tell the older child that it is their baby. Tell them that they can help mommy take care of the new baby. Let them do little things to help out with the baby like get diapers or clothing, so that they feel like they are a part of the whole thing. Get the older child their own baby. When I had my second baby, we got my older son his own baby with a blanket and a bottle. He loved the idea and felt like he was taking care of his baby too.
My son and I play the thats my baby game. My son is definitely in the mine stage and we use it to our advantage. When we can see that hes having a little trouble with the attention the baby is getting, we just say, Thats my baby! and of course, he starts to argue with us and says the baby is his. He will hug him and kiss him on top of his little bald head and say, No, thats my baby brother! Its sweet and its also a great way to get him into having a baby around.
Treat Them the Same
I know this one may seem like a duh, but many people make the mistake of forgetting that the first one was the baby before the new baby came along. That is to say that the first one was the baby and was treated like the baby since he was born and then the baby comes along and all of the sudden he is the big kid. While it is important that your child grows up and gains independence, you should not stop doting on them as you did before. This will only make them feel worse if you do stop. If you are kissing the babies tummy, then turn around and kiss your big kids tummy too.
Your child needs to have the impression that you love them both the same and one is not more important than the other. My husband and I felt silly playing with our three-year-old in the same way that we played with the baby, but we found that it made him feel better. My son LOVES his baby brother. He is very sweet with him and it is because we have done these things to make him feel just as loved and happy as he did before the baby came around.
The Potty Thing
Many people complain that their child was perfectly potty trained before the baby came along and then started regressing because the baby had diapers. My son did not particularly have trouble in this area, but some people say that their kids do. Regression is perfectly normal in older children with new babies. We allow our son to watch us change his brothers diaper, but we just tell him that it is yucky and he will have to help us teach him how to use the potty when hes older. We tell him that we are so proud of him that he doesnt have any yucky pants because he is so big. He seems to be content with that. Different things work for different children, but I would say that you should continue to praise your children for using the potty appropriately.
A new baby can be a happy, but stressful time for a family. It is important to always include your older child as much as possible in having a new baby around. You should implement sharing and never treat them differently than you did before the baby was born. Your children will get along famously and you will be glad you have implemented these techniques.
This Article was brought to you by: Lucy Cope
http://myfreebeebook.com ?Free Childrens Book
Download the PDF version of this article:
http://myfreebeebook.com/Documents/Get%20Your%20Older%20Child%20Used%20to%20the%20New%20Baby.pdf
Great Resources for Parents:
Is your big kid potty trained? Potty Training In 1 to 3 Days
Thinking of having a baby? Pick Your Babys Gender?Guaranteed Results!
Go for your goals: Goal Setting For Kids
Teaching Children About MoneyRaising Kid Entreprenuers
Learn to communicate with your baby with Baby Sign Language
Baby Sleep Solution Audio Program?Get baby to sleep
Teach Baby To Read ?Very affordable system!
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The Woes Of Teenage Relationships
By Aydan Corkern
When teens start dating their heads are up in the clouds and fantasies about a long life together, which most of them wined up in a breakup and than they cry, they get angry, their eyes burning with fire, and they hate them and for what they don’t even know why they are that way. In high school 3 out of 5 teens will end up in a very bad relationship, which comes up to them breaking up. Some of these long relationships will become practice for them and it might keep them from getting into another relationship later in life because they don’t want to end up life the ones that they had before, all the hurting, crying, stomach pains, feeling being let down, or feeling down for themselves.
They avoid dating and other people that like them because they are scared to fall in love with anyone. They close themselves in to keep away from this and it will be hard for them to open up to someone again. Even if they are in a good relationship they get scared and they breakup and they think it will go bad and end up in hurt and pain, so they end it before it happens and they think no one will get hurt by getting their heart broken. If you live in a small town, some people that breakup when to get out of there because there are to many memory’s and they don’t want to get hurt again and also they don’t want to see them because it hurts. Lots of relationship end way before they get married or even think about getting married, in some cases it is good for them but in other cases it is bad because they loved them so much.
Some teens that are in a relationship they breakup because they found someone new or they want something new and it hurt the other person and some of them don’t care because that what they want. It could when you are in a relationship for a few months or years, you will never know and it will hit you hard and you may not get over it for a long time because your heart was tripped out of the cheat. Some teen relationship end when they have sex, they will tell you that they love you and they want to be with you always, but really all that they were after was the sex. You will feel so hurt and upset with yourselves that you will never get into something like that again, even when you are older.
Aydan Corkern is a writer of many topics, visit some of her sites, like
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The Con Of The ’60s : A Look At The Reality Behind The Decade Synonymous With Peace And Love
By Samantha Gilmartin
It’s difficult to define the edges of an epoch. Sometimes thoughts, ideologies and fashions seem to gel together so cohesively into a period of time that we claim them as a separate era. Are we always aware when they begin though? Or where and when they come to an end?
The decade of the 1960s is certainly one of the clearest examples of period of time that has taken on a tangible identity. Remembered, eulogised, elegised, mourned for and mythologised, the 1960s evokes clearer, stronger and more emotional responses than almost any other. The only question therefore, is ‘why’?
Culturally, the ’60s saw the continuation of the artistic liberation that had begun in the 1950s. In both Britain and America, music, art and cinema had started to better acknowledge and represent the voices of the young. Presley, Pollock and James Dean had become icons of a new class in the States whilst, recovering from the gloom of rationing, Britain focussed on angry playwrights like John Osbourne and Harold Pinter that were breaking down social and artistic barriers with their irreverent and challenging drama.
Of course the ’60s had its own icons too: The Beatles, Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix, John F Kennedy, Bobby Kennedy and Martin Luthur King. Though it’s true that these couldn’t belong to any other decade, it’s not as if they came out of nowhere, out of the clear blue, so to speak. They evolved and appeared as luminaries do in any other time.
It may be worth bearing in mind also, that though the ’60s gave us all of the icons mentioned above, none of them survived passed 1970. As good at giving birth to icons, it would seem, the 1960s was equally good at burying them.
Heralded for its optimism, its preoccupation with love and liberation, in reality the ’60s witnessed the burgeoning of the Vietnam War and the first use of conscription since WW2; vehement racial segregation; the pinnacle of the Cold War, the clandestine cleansing of supposed communist ideals and the widespread paranoia that ensued; violent student protests and the politically motivated murders of public figures that had advocated liberalism and pacifism.
Okay, you may argue, freedoms need to be fought for, bought and paid for, but then why ally the ’60s with peace and love and not struggle?
The end of the sixties is often accredited to the free Rolling Stones concert held at Altamont, northern California, on December 6th, 1969. Billed as ‘the Woodstock of the West’, the concert was organised by the Rolling Stones but also featured Santana, Jefferson Airplane, The Flying Burrito Brothers and Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young. A free concert, the event was alleged to have been ‘policed’ by the Hell’s Angels for $500 worth of beer.
In an attempt to recreate their momentous free gig in Hyde Park the previous July, The Stones’ concert at Altamont would be famous for very different reasons.
Stirred up by reports that members of The Hell’s Angels were being violent towards the ‘hippie’ crowd, tensions at the concert began to seriously escalate. Numerous accounts of beatings were reported throughout the event until, right in front of the stage, 18-year-old Meredith Hunter was stabbed to death. In full view of the Maysles brothers’ camera that was capturing the concert for a documentary, Meredith Hunter can be seen brandishing a long-barrelled revolver before the alleged killer, Alan Passaro, bundles into him with a flurry stabbing movements.
Three other deaths were reported at Altamont that night though none other were as a result of a possible homicide. Where as Woodstock became synonymous with the ’60s idyll of peace and love, Altamont became a symbol of the death of this dream and the end of the 1960s.
As if one ending wasn’t enough, the incident that took place at Kent State University in Ohio five months later is also credited as the day the ’60s ended.
In reaction to President Nixon’s invasion of Cambodia, students around the world had begun to stage huge protests. At Kent State these protests took the shape of a huge ’student strike’ and a rally conducted on the grounds of the university campus. On May 1st, a late night demonstration in the surrounding town had turned disruptive. The police were called but a crowd of about 100 people, made up of a mixture of students, bikers and out-of-town youths, began pelting them with stones and bottles. Three days later, on May 4th, another demonstration on campus was just getting started when an armed team from the Ohio National Guard turned up to disperse the protesters.
It was then, just after midday, that certain officers of the National Guard opened fire on a section of students; they wounded nine and killed four. The devastating aggression of government forces toward young adults of their own country in the final blossoming of their education is a travesty in any time period. That it comes so closely on the heels of a decade that supposedly cherished peace and understanding puts things into a very clear perspective.
Could this of happened in the 1960s? Of course it could; everyone involved had lived through and had been shaped by the previous decade so there is no logical reason to suggest otherwise.
The result would therefore point to the conclusion that to construct timeframes of certain historical periods can be misleading. Though ideas, attitudes and fashions may seem to connect together to cause cohesive eras, this is almost never a complex enough reading to be truly valuable. The response should then be to resist mourning the passing of certain time periods and instead to focus on that which is possible today or tomorrow. Imbuing the past with a sense of magic and majesty can do little but tarnish the perception of the present. One who insists on revelling in the glories of the past cannot then prepare to glory in the future.
Samantha is an expert Research and Theatre consultant. She is currently excited about the upcoming West End revival of Oliver!
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Thursday, November 20th, 2008 at 12:40 pm and is filed under love. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
